Hi everyone, I certainly miss you all and the times of prayer and worship for each other!!! I am writing with an urgent prayer request knowing yall are meeting tonight and wishing I could be there to be prayed for in person! I am in dire need of prayer! Thank you all in advance!!
Most of you know that here in Tanzania I have been working with a Baptist church that has a project supporting ‘orphans’ in the neighborhood and among church widows. This project was started by the church 10 years ago and increased greatly by some Canadian Christians who have been footing the bill all these years. I taught school a few years with the director of the program, Nelson, and ever since I left Mwanza in 2006 he has been asking me to come back to help with the project. Finally in 2013 that is what I came to do. The Canadians have been sending money to help with food, school needs, health needs, etc for the kids, their caregivers and the committee of church members who help. I was to come to be the ‘spiritual’ arm, discipling and counseling kids and caregivers and working with the church. And I was also to help the Canadians better understand things in light of culture, etc. since they have only visited a few times and know nothing about the culture, people, challenges, language, schools, hospitals, etc. here. Based on a lot of different things, mostly corruption and dishonest management of money by the leaders and church of the project, they ended it yesterday.
I have been in the middle of all of it these last 3 years, finding a bunch out and trying to press on for the Gospel anyway, trying to push towards confession and repentance. A lot of agonizing prayers!! I still am in the middle of it all now that the money is over and everyone is going to be really upset. They wont find out til next week bc kids have midterms and we don’t want them to fail. I know He has a plan for them all. I was invited by these people and how could I not have discovered all of this? Of course I would. I know that I was supposed to come here and be here now, but it is still going to be horrible. Please pray for the kids, the real orphans, the real widows, those truly in need who have benefitted from this project and who are going to lose out because it’s over. I believe they are reaping what they have sowed and that they have depended on MAN and money over God. But the kids are mostly innocent and God has used it for good. So pray for us all. Pray for there to be conviction, repentance and revival come out of it!!!! Pray this is a victory for God and not the Devil!!!
I have tried and successfully worked to share Christ and disciple the children caught in the middle of this mess. My ministry has never been more fruitful in leading these kids to Christ, seeing lives changed, even seeing healings. I have more kids coming to be discipled who are NOT directly involved in this mess than that are. I don’t believe my work here is finished. I know this is a spiritual fight and I don’t want to leave here and give up this ground to the enemy! I don’t want to give up these kids to him! I want to stay and teach them the TRUTH! To me, there is nothing more important than that and I should stay here at all costs and fight for their souls.
The other issue is my contract is with this project and church which means my residence permit and visa to be in the country is tied up in it and it is timed to get it all renewed so I can stay in the country. As far as I know it can be easily done, but I don’t know under what capacity. All this to say that my future is a complete mystery and a lot needs to be decided this week. I knew in my spirit that this year would bring a lot of change but I also expected clearer direction. I know it is all in God’s hands and I need guidance about what to do. I am here and I don’t want to leave these kids I am working with. As I type the imam is preaching who knows what garbage over a VERY loud speaker over this neighborhood. And one of my new kids who has been coming, our next door neighbor, is getting yelled at and beaten—by two different adults. These people need Jesus and I’m not willing to leave them yet!! But I have to have a Tanzanian letter/contract/sponsor to do that and I’m not sure how all that is going to work out now.
I had a dream last night but don’t remember all of it. The part I do remember was that I put my hand into a small black plastic bag to pull out something that had been thrown away but I knew it had something in it that was still of use. I wanted to save it, so I put my hand in and my hand came out unexpectedly covered in filth and feces and so was the thing. Yet I still had a strong desire to save the thing, make it clean for further use, save it for another day. There are plenty of possible interpretations of that, I guess. Who or what is the ‘dirty thing that could still be used.’ The church? Me? The director, Nelson? All of us?? He isn’t finished with any of us and He can still use us!! Like I said, I don’t think God is finished with me here and I want to keep up the good fight for him here, so please pray for me! Thank you in advance, Much love in Christ, Kay